Joey Collewijn at Celebrity Centre International is here to help you find your purpose in the Sea Org!
This not at all cheesy and predatory looking young man has but a singular purpose – to help you find your purpose in life (which unsurprisingly involves a life of Sea Org slave labor and 18 hour workdays). Whether that purpose is peeling potatoes in the galley, polishing commodes with toothbrushes until they sparkle, or swabbing the deck on an asbestos-laden ghost ship you’ll know that you’re forwarding command intention during your billion year contract!
And if you’re one of the lucky ones, you too might get to sit on picturesque balconies while selling billion-year enslavement to unsuspecting saps who will only see picturesque balconies in forbidden magazines while sneaking a 5 minute break.
Call Joey today – your future awaits!